Seagull Field Reports Archives

If My Dog Was as Repulsive as Serge Matta, I’d Shave Its Ass and Tell Him to Walk Backwards

September 20, 2026 by Danielle Hopkins

There are people who go through life accumulating accomplishments. There are people who build things, fix things, invent things, or at least manage to make it through a workday without attracting the attention of federal securities regulators. And then there is Serge Matta. Matta is currently President of Global Ad Sales at LG Ad Solutions, … Read more

The Dumb TV Was Better: Smart Features Gave LG Too Much Power

September 20, 2026 by Danielle Hopkins

TLDR The old television was stupid, and that was one of its best features. You plugged something into it. The TV displayed the picture. It didn’t need your account, your advertising preferences, your viewing history, information about nearby Wi-Fi networks, access to other devices on your LAN, a microphone, six privacy agreements, or permission to … Read more

Seagull Field Report: How to Identify the Real Threat at a Commander Table

September 15, 2026 by Steven Seagull

Comic-style scene of a stern anthropomorphic seagull in black martial-arts clothing pointing across a fantasy card-game table at a hooded purple-lit opponent, with a roaring dinosaur, castle, cards, dice, deck boxes, and magical effects around them.

A tactical guide to finding the real threat at a Commander table by judging win potential, hidden resources, engines, graveyards, and political incentives.